life sucks for me nowedays so much, too many things fall on me at once and i didin't really know how to find myself in it. but after weeks dealing with all this stuff i actually realized that the reason why i keep going is not hope, but security that everything will be ok, that I CAN DO IT.
also this blog is a powerful tool - like meeting with a therapist for free;-)
so, since my skin can't meet sun i'be been closed into a little prison for a while know (like i called my house), and i don't have to tell you, how is the feeling when sun is shinning, long weekend ahead, and friends inviting you for barbecue or dh biking and you HAVE TO say NO.
also, i probably don't have to tell you how happy i was 2day morning when i saw a cloudy sky!
finally could go out with t-shirt and shorts, without hat, sunglasses and hoodie, such a pleasure!
and finally could used my bike again! and i really don't remember when i was that happy while biking in da rain last time...
and when im feeling sad or something, there is one qnote which always brings warm feeling into my heart:
The lotus is a flower that growns in the mud.
The ticker and deeper the mud, the more beautiful the lostus blooms. 
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